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      08-14-2007, 07:19 PM   #1
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ways to get rid of telemarketers

Telemarketers suck big time. Here are some proven ways to rid your life of them for good...

1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

2. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died . . . "

3. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business, how many people work there, how they got into this line of work if they are married, how many kids they have, etc. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.

4. (This works great if you are male) Telemarketer: "Hi, my name is Judy and I'm with XYZ Company. " You: Wait for a second and with a real husky voice ask, "What are you wearing?"

5. Cry out in surprise, "Judy? Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

6. Say "No" over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up.

7. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends, would you be my friend?"

8. If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can you get out blood? Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?"

9. After the Telemarketer gives his or her spiel, ask him or her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you can't just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

10. If the Telemarketer is selling raffle tickets, tell him or her that you work for the same company, and that employees cannot participate.

11. Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a Telemarketer, set the receiver down, scream, "OH MY GOD!" and then hang up.

12. Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask if he/she will give you their home phone number so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" and proceed to hang up.

13. Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times.

14. Tell them it is dinner time, but ask if they would please hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your dinner conversation. For added effect, clanging of cutlery and dishes is recommended.

15. Tell the Telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and ask if they could bring you some beer.

16. Ask them to fax the information to you, and make up a number.

17. Tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I'll listen to you. But I should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any clothes."

18. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on, Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?"

19. Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to speak up... louder... louder!

20. Tell them to talk very slowly, because you want to write every word down.


i personally used some, very funny lol
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      08-14-2007, 09:41 PM   #2
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This is kinda cool
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      08-14-2007, 09:45 PM   #3
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The very best way to do it, is to put your phone number on the "do not call list" It's a federal and local list, you wont get calls anymore.

Much easier than just being an asshole.

They're people too, they're just trying to make some money. Give em a break, telemarketing is one job that everyone should have once in their life. Along with waitressing/waitering and car sales, it's one of those jobs you need to experience for yourself.

If you need to make some young kid feel bad, so you can feel better about yourself, you're are a very sad individual. You dont know who they are, what their story is, who are you to judge?
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      08-14-2007, 09:50 PM   #4
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they drive me crazy.I know they are just trying to make a living but its really annoying especially when they wake up the baby.that really pisses me off.
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      08-14-2007, 09:50 PM   #5
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i like #4.
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      08-14-2007, 10:00 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cadillac Johnson View Post
The very best way to do it, is to put your phone number on the "do not call list" It's a federal and local list, you wont get calls anymore.

Much easier than just being an asshole.

They're people too, they're just trying to make some money. Give em a break, telemarketing is one job that everyone should have once in their life. Along with waitressing/waitering and car sales, it's one of those jobs you need to experience for yourself.

If you need to make some young kid feel bad, so you can feel better about yourself, you're are a very sad individual. You dont know who they are, what their story is, who are you to judge?
I was a Telemarketer for 3 weeks and it was an EASY job, but too annoying and too much to read, i got paid 10$ an hour(good student raise thing). And when ever someone played a joke on me it made my job better. But it rarely happened. I think just playing a "friendly" joke is better than when some1 curses and hangs up.
i quit and and got a job at a cell phone stand which was better because i did nothing all day and got paid for it.

And honestly the peopledont mind, well the people i worked with didnt, they ranged from ages 18-oldest guy 32.
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      08-14-2007, 10:03 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cadillac Johnson View Post
The very best way to do it, is to put your phone number on the "do not call list" It's a federal and local list, you wont get calls anymore.

Much easier than just being an asshole.

They're people too, they're just trying to make some money. Give em a break, telemarketing is one job that everyone should have once in their life. Along with waitressing/waitering and car sales, it's one of those jobs you need to experience for yourself.

If you need to make some young kid feel bad, so you can feel better about yourself, you're are a very sad individual. You dont know who they are, what their story is, who are you to judge?
Oh please I spent time being a telemarketer and the job sucks ass. I dont agree with the main premise of harasing people you dont know to try to sell them something. Cold calls suck for both the caller and the person getting harassed. Sometimes when I hang up on them they actually call back. I had this one idiot call me back 4 times. They are truly annoying and need to stop. Finding new ways to get rid of them is awesome!
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      08-14-2007, 10:07 PM   #8
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I have no pity for the companies that employ unsolicited automated greeting calls. I can't tell you how infuriating it is to have 6 messages from automated message machines on my answering machine each night. It's actually illegal to do that but I don't understand how companies can get away with doing it. I'm seriously thinking about tracking each one of them down and suing them into oblivion for violating State and Federal laws, but I'm just too damn lazy. If I get a human on the line I'm at least polite to them because I too had a telemarketing (inside sales) job when I was younger.
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      08-14-2007, 10:29 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fotios330i View Post
they drive me crazy.I know they are just trying to make a living but its really annoying especially when they wake up the baby.that really pisses me off.
Quote:
Originally Posted by K3N R3D View Post
Oh please I spent time being a telemarketer and the job sucks ass. I dont agree with the main premise of harasing people you dont know to try to sell them something. Cold calls suck for both the caller and the person getting harassed. Sometimes when I hang up on them they actually call back. I had this one idiot call me back 4 times. They are truly annoying and need to stop. Finding new ways to get rid of them is awesome!
Quote:
Originally Posted by gum5h03 View Post
I have no pity for the companies that employ unsolicited automated greeting calls. I can't tell you how infuriating it is to have 6 messages from automated message machines on my answering machine each night. It's actually illegal to do that but I don't understand how companies can get away with doing it. I'm seriously thinking about tracking each one of them down and suing them into oblivion for violating State and Federal laws, but I'm just too damn lazy. If I get a human on the line I'm at least polite to them because I too had a telemarketing (inside sales) job when I was younger.
Register for the 'Do not call list'

That's all you have to do, you wont get calls. If you do, the company will be fined. They get updated lists every 3 months, it automatically removes names and numbers from the system.

If telemarketers piss you guys off that much, that's all it takes.. Try that, until you do that, you will keep getting calls. It doesnt make sense to complain about something you can easily control.
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      08-14-2007, 11:08 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cadillac Johnson View Post
The very best way to do it, is to put your phone number on the "do not call list" It's a federal and local list, you wont get calls anymore.

Much easier than just being an asshole.

They're people too, they're just trying to make some money. Give em a break, telemarketing is one job that everyone should have once in their life. Along with waitressing/waitering and car sales, it's one of those jobs you need to experience for yourself.

If you need to make some young kid feel bad, so you can feel better about yourself, you're are a very sad individual. You dont know who they are, what their story is, who are you to judge?

it does not work too well buddy
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      08-14-2007, 11:18 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LACA335i View Post
it does not work too well buddy
+1

I've been on the DNC list for years and STILL get calls from them. They do not get fined no matter what anyone says. They just fold up shop and start a new business name before the FCC can prosecute them.
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      08-14-2007, 11:20 PM   #12
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I usually just tell them "I NO ENGLISH" and then hang up
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      08-14-2007, 11:57 PM   #13
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"Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask if he/she will give you their home phone number so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" and proceed to hang up."


Not sure if my friend's dad invented this but he did that 7 years ago. It was hilarious!!
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      08-15-2007, 12:06 AM   #14
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I did that donotcall.gov thing.. Kinda wish I didn't do that now so I can mess with them.. hahahha...
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      08-15-2007, 03:34 AM   #15
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So, your saying it does work?

Look all I'm saying is this; complaining about telemarketers is like going to a restaurant, they ask you "smoking? or non-smoking?" you say "whatever" they put you in smoking, and then you complain about the smoke.

The do not call list does work.
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      08-15-2007, 03:36 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gum5h03 View Post
+1

I've been on the DNC list for years and STILL get calls from them. They do not get fined no matter what anyone says. They just fold up shop and start a new business name before the FCC can prosecute them.
Ok, that's about the dumbest thing I've ever heard. What kind of company does that? Who are you getting calls from? Seriously..

Also, unless you renew you number, it will be removed from the do not call list. It will expire after a year or so, and you have to re-register.

That's why your getting calls..
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      08-15-2007, 03:44 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cadillac Johnson View Post
Ok, that's about the dumbest thing I've ever heard. What kind of company does that? Who are you getting calls from? Seriously..

Also, unless you renew you number, it will be removed from the do not call list. It will expire after a year or so, and you have to re-register.

That's why your getting calls..
Look asshole don't fucking insult my intelligence. I renew every year and haven't changed my home phone number. The DNC works for some but not all telemarketing operations especially the fly by night operations. Dish Network - now Echostar is notorious for hiring unscrupulous contractors to do their telemarketing bidding. Look it up man, thousands of lawsuits for illegal telemarketing. Oh wait, since you're the resident telemarketing/FCC/legal expert you already knew that didn't you.
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      08-15-2007, 03:53 AM   #18
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Look I'm sorry if your pussy hurts. I didn't mean to make you cry, and wasn't aware this was such a touchy subject for you. I realize it must be painfull everytime you waste 3 seconds of your time to answer the phone, say your not interested and hang up.

Do you get this upset when commercials interupt your favorite tv. or radio show? I sure hope not..

Just relax buddy, it's a fucking phone call, it's not worth it.
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      08-15-2007, 04:06 AM   #19
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You're GDR I'm pissed. One, you assume way too many things based upon your own experience. The whole world doesn't revolve around you sorry. And two, why do I have to listen to 5 pre-fucking-recorded messages each day telling me why I need to upgrade to the latest and greatest DVR/Dish Newtork satellite system before I get to an important message? And these assholes call with their automated systems day and night. It's not just a simple phone call. It's someone intruding on MY life and coming into MY home and bugging the crap outta me. If I'm watching a game having a beer and some jackass calls and interrupts ME at 8PM wanting to sell satellite or whatever I get pissed. Who wouldn't - especially since I AM on the DNC and they are supposed to follow that list!
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      08-15-2007, 12:59 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gum5h03 View Post
You're GDR I'm pissed. One, you assume way too many things based upon your own experience. The whole world doesn't revolve around you sorry. And two, why do I have to listen to 5 pre-fucking-recorded messages each day telling me why I need to upgrade to the latest and greatest DVR/Dish Newtork satellite system before I get to an important message? And these assholes call with their automated systems day and night. It's not just a simple phone call. It's someone intruding on MY life and coming into MY home and bugging the crap outta me. If I'm watching a game having a beer and some jackass calls and interrupts ME at 8PM wanting to sell satellite or whatever I get pissed. Who wouldn't - especially since I AM on the DNC and they are supposed to follow that list!
Why are you still answering this idiot? You can never win an argument with someone who feels they know it all. just let it go. Trust me..
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      08-15-2007, 01:13 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cadillac Johnson View Post
So, your saying it does work?

Look all I'm saying is this; complaining about telemarketers is like going to a restaurant, they ask you "smoking? or non-smoking?" you say "whatever" they put you in smoking, and then you complain about the smoke.

The do not call list does work.
For some reason I have a house phone that I never use.. The only calls I get on that phone is from telemarketers.. Since I registered its been quiet at my house...

Every time those fools used to call me I would ask them to please stop calling.. It was a telemarketer that told me about that do not call list..

I got no complaints, works for me.
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      08-15-2007, 01:18 PM   #22
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DNC list for 2 years. Not one call.
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