The Next Time You Get Pulled Over.....

alexmadison · 10-12-2009, 05:21 PM

I found this one and laughed my A** OFF

Quote:

I don't get to see my girflriend too much because I work so many hours a week that it's almost impossible. That, mixed with her schedule, doesn't make for much time to see her. When I do find time to see her, I fly from work to her house going 90 in a 55 MPH zone.

That being said, Monday I was speeding to her house from work. I was on a local highway and about 5 minutes from her house when the blue lights blinded my eyes from my rear-view mirror. Damn, I've just been pulled over.

The officer walked up to my car, asked how I was doing, then the usual "license and registration, please". Nothing out of the ordinary.

I carry a gun for my profession and still had it strapped to my side, so I showed him my work ID and gun permit BEFORE whipping out the gun and saying:

"Here's my gun! I'm allowed to carry one!"

Phew, won't do that one again.

After looking over the permit, he eyeballed my crotch.

"I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the car, sir. Keep your hands where I can see them."

Either he's a gay cop, or he has a problem with the gun.

I was asked to put my hands on the roof of the car. He pulled my 357 out of its holder.

"I'm going to hold onto this while I run your license, if you don't mind. You can step back into the car."

I got in and shut my door.

"So, Mr. Justin, why were you driving so fast?"

At this moment, my bull**** dispenser started cranking. I could afford another ticket, but would rather not deal with an increased insurance rate. I started spitting a line of total BS.

"Well sir, my job doesn't allow me to see my fiance very much. Since this is the first time in forever that I'm going to see her, I'm rushing to her house to pop the question. I apologize for speeding, I'm just so excited to see the look on her face when I ask her to marry me."

"Do you have a ring?"

"No sir, can't afford one."

"Ah, poor kid."

"I know. Could you do me a favor and write me a ticket? I'd like to look back on this night and laugh about the time I was pulled over and given a ticket the night I was rushing to propose to my wife."

The reason I asked him this is to make my story seem to check out. I'm calling his bluff, if you will.

"Haha, you kids. I'll tell you what-- I'll do you one better. I'll escort you over there through traffic if you're in that much of a rush. Wouldn't that be more of a story?"

Damnit. The guy's caught up in making a Kodak moment when all I want to do is get him off my back and eat tacos with my girlfriend... NOT propose. I've only known the girl for two months-- not exactly ready for the big commitment yet.

"Yes sir, I do believe it would."

After giving him her street name and address, he knew exactly where to go. ****. I got in my car and followed him as his siren rang out. Traffic pulled to the side, peopled yielded at red lights, and cars stopped-- all so I could have tacos with my girlfriend.

After getting to her house, the officer stepped out of his car and knocked on her door. She opened it and stared at him, then me in a look of confusion.

"Hi, I pulled this gentleman over a few minutes ago because he was in a rush to get over here so fast. Justin? Would you like to take it from here?"

I looked at Courtney, then the officer, who wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. I tried to take her inside, but the officer stood right there in the doorway to witness the event. The things I'd do to get out of a ticket.

"Courtney... I know I've only known you a short time. But, in that short time <insert romantic bull****>... Will you marry me?"

She wouldn't say yes. She's younger than I am and always talked about how she wanted to date a guy forever until making a commitment.

''YES JUSTIN! I WILL MARRY YOU!"

The officer smiled and clapped as Courtney clamped her arms around my body. The neighbors, who had been wondering why a cop car with its lights on was outside her house cheered.

Courtney's parents called me and told me that they were proud that their daughter found such a nice guy.

Me? Well I got out of a ticket.

**** you. I'm engaged.

-Sideburns

http://funny-speeding-tickets.blogspot.com/

g14classified · 10-12-2009, 05:29 PM

hahah good story

Scimitar335i · 10-13-2009, 08:40 AM

I still would have cited him. I learned early on that some people would say ANYTHING to get out of a ticket!

darkcloud · 10-13-2009, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scimitar335i

I still would have cited him. I learned early on that some people would say ANYTHING to get out of a ticket!

you jerk

This will get ya. I get out of all my tickets. Why, cuz I serve summons' and work for several area county courts. Why ticket the guy doing the job you'd be doing if it were for me.

MJC///M3 · 10-13-2009, 09:40 AM

great story.

Bimmer Nerd · 10-13-2009, 06:01 PM

hahah LOL

Kroy · 10-13-2009, 08:14 PM

Lesson learned; bite the bullet and pay the ticket.

BMW F22 · 10-13-2009, 10:02 PM

I kid you not I was thinking of trying something like this a while back. The only thing that held me back was the thought of the cop actually being there in the room to witness things. Glad someone else has done it so I can learn from them.

maswastage · 10-13-2009, 10:07 PM

Seems like that cop called the bluff and raised all in.

synclastica_86 · 10-14-2009, 03:53 AM

I'd just stick with the old Heisenberg's Uncertainty excuse.

alexmadison · 10-15-2009, 01:56 PM

Quote:

http://funny-speeding-tickets.blogspot.com

here's one they need to add to the website.

Hawkeye · 10-15-2009, 04:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scimitar335i

I still would have cited him. I learned early on that some people would say ANYTHING to get out of a ticket!

Yeah, but what he got was MUCH worse than a ticket

Haha, funny ass story!

SoCali E36 · 10-15-2009, 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scimitar335i

I still would have cited him. I learned early on that some people would say ANYTHING to get out of a ticket!

That's why decent cops are hard to come by.

Scimitar335i · 10-15-2009, 07:53 PM

My biggest thing about that was what would have happened if the guy was following me "speeding" while I was escorting him home and all of a sudden gets into a car accident/hits something/loses control/ etc.. there is SO MUCH LIABILITY to that...

Better yet the guy should have crashed into something, claimed he was injured, sued that department for a couple million bucks and lived like a fat rat instead of marrying someone he didn't want to lol...

When the superiors asked the cop why he did what he did.. well.. he wouldn't have a leg to stand on when the department got sued. Gone are the old cowboy days... you can get complaints/sued for just looking at someone cross-eyed nowadays...

samwoo2go · 10-16-2009, 07:17 AM

you know what would've been an epic win, if after the girl said yes, the cop pulls out the ticket anyways and goes well congratulations heres your early wedding present lol.

darkphantom · 10-16-2009, 11:39 AM

Wow. LOL

Here's a story from a friend, not how often it will work.

He's driving home with a friend and they've just grabbed some food. Rushing home for some errand or another, can't remember exactly what it was.

The officer pulls them over and my friend tells the driver to grab a bite of the hamburger and get a gulp of coke. As the officer is approaching his car, the driver makes a queasy face and right as he is about to ask him for his license, opens the door and "vomits" the food.

Next line: "I'm sorry officer, I'm just trying to get home. I'm not feeling very well."

lol, this was after "vomiting" the food on the officer's shoes....
Officer took a look at them, and told em to go home.
I would've thought he'd be more pissed and given them a ticket....but I guess not??

Haha. *knocks on wood* ticket free for over a year!

darkphantom · 10-16-2009, 11:42 AM

edit: double post???

10-12-2009, 05:29 PM	#2
g14classified My other ride has 2 wheels... 5 Rep 140 Posts Drives: '08 AW 335i Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: SoCal iTrader: (1)	hahah good story
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10-13-2009, 08:40 AM	#3
Scimitar335i Major 213 Rep 1,313 Posts Drives: 2007 335i Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Bay Area iTrader: (12)	I still would have cited him. I learned early on that some people would say ANYTHING to get out of a ticket! __________________ 2007 TiAg e90 335i sport. Yes, The e90 "Mustache" is cool!
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10-13-2009, 09:40 AM	#5
MJC///M3 Colonel 91 Rep 2,323 Posts Drives: 09 SSII E92 M3 Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Bronx, NYC iTrader: (0)	great story. __________________ "You will get there, but it is up to you and you alone. It is what you are willing to do, and how you are willing to get there. You must be relentless, you must be tireless, you must pursue at all costs, so that you are ready, when the time is right." -Dad
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10-13-2009, 06:01 PM	#6
Bimmer Nerd Major General 527 Rep 7,783 Posts Drives: 6MT F80 Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Santa Monica, CA iTrader: (12)	hahah LOL
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10-13-2009, 08:14 PM	#7
Kroy Brigadier General 177 Rep 3,032 Posts Drives: E90 Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Los Angeles, CA iTrader: (1)	Lesson learned; bite the bullet and pay the ticket.
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10-13-2009, 10:02 PM	#8
BMW F22 Major General 3668 Rep 9,783 Posts Drives: ///M235i Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Bay Area iTrader: (8)	I kid you not I was thinking of trying something like this a while back. The only thing that held me back was the thought of the cop actually being there in the room to witness things. Glad someone else has done it so I can learn from them.
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10-13-2009, 10:07 PM	#9
maswastage Resident Diesel Junkie 56 Rep 1,070 Posts Drives: 2010 AW 335d Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Maryland iTrader: (0)	Seems like that cop called the bluff and raised all in.
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10-14-2009, 03:53 AM	#10
synclastica_86 Captain 250 Rep 735 Posts Drives: F32 435i, E92 M3, S550 Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Hong Kong iTrader: (0) Garage List 2013 BMW F32 435iA [0.00] 2009 BMW E92 M3 [0.00] 2008 Mercedes S550 ... [0.00]	I'd just stick with the old Heisenberg's Uncertainty excuse. __________________ Current: BMW F32 435iA M-Sports; BMW E92 M3, M-DCT; Mercedes W221 S550 4matic; Ford Fiesta ST; Nissan Silvia S15 Spec-R Retired: BMW E93 323iA; BMW E85 Z4 3.0i, SMG; Lexus IS 250 AWD; Lexus GX 470; Mercedes W203 C230 Sportscoupe; Peugeot 206 S16; Peugeot 206 RC
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10-15-2009, 07:53 PM	#14
Scimitar335i Major 213 Rep 1,313 Posts Drives: 2007 335i Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Bay Area iTrader: (12)	My biggest thing about that was what would have happened if the guy was following me "speeding" while I was escorting him home and all of a sudden gets into a car accident/hits something/loses control/ etc.. there is SO MUCH LIABILITY to that... Better yet the guy should have crashed into something, claimed he was injured, sued that department for a couple million bucks and lived like a fat rat instead of marrying someone he didn't want to lol... When the superiors asked the cop why he did what he did.. well.. he wouldn't have a leg to stand on when the department got sued. Gone are the old cowboy days... you can get complaints/sued for just looking at someone cross-eyed nowadays... __________________ 2007 TiAg e90 335i sport. Yes, The e90 "Mustache" is cool!
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10-16-2009, 07:17 AM	#15
samwoo2go Banned 472 Rep 779 Posts Drives: E92 335i Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: SoCal iTrader: (12)	you know what would've been an epic win, if after the girl said yes, the cop pulls out the ticket anyways and goes well congratulations heres your early wedding present lol.
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10-16-2009, 11:39 AM	#16
darkphantom Banned 633 Rep 5,945 Posts Drives: E93 335i Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: The place for Bimmers iTrader: (4)	Wow. LOL Here's a story from a friend, not how often it will work. He's driving home with a friend and they've just grabbed some food. Rushing home for some errand or another, can't remember exactly what it was. The officer pulls them over and my friend tells the driver to grab a bite of the hamburger and get a gulp of coke. As the officer is approaching his car, the driver makes a queasy face and right as he is about to ask him for his license, opens the door and "vomits" the food. Next line: "I'm sorry officer, I'm just trying to get home. I'm not feeling very well." lol, this was after "vomiting" the food on the officer's shoes.... Officer took a look at them, and told em to go home. I would've thought he'd be more pissed and given them a ticket....but I guess not?? Haha. knocks on wood ticket free for over a year!
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10-16-2009, 11:42 AM	#17
darkphantom Banned 633 Rep 5,945 Posts Drives: E93 335i Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: The place for Bimmers iTrader: (4)	edit: double post???
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