BMW i5 and 5-Series Forum

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      06-19-2023, 10:40 PM   #1
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This has got to be the funniest for sale car ad...

Check it out.... hilarious!

You gotta read the entire "Seller's Description".
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      06-19-2023, 11:06 PM   #2
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That's too funny...though, why anyone would buy that thing, I don't quite know!
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      06-20-2023, 12:02 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mcsquared View Post
That's too funny...though, why anyone would buy that thing, I don't quite know!
His wife told him to sell it, but he really wants to keep it! All he has to say is he can't sell it
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      06-20-2023, 12:13 AM   #4
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He he he
Completely assumed of his mistake, depression is evident in his words.

"It drives with presence but not competence"


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Originally Posted by mcsquared View Post
That's too funny...though, why anyone would buy that thing, I don't quite know!
Every day some fool goes out on the street, whoever finds it, keeps it.
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      06-20-2023, 12:13 AM   #5
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Haha! Solid…
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      06-20-2023, 12:42 AM   #6
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That was one of the funniest ads I've read thanks for sharing!
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      06-20-2023, 01:03 AM   #7
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Hilarious, love it. About a decade ago there was a church that occupied a suite in the same building where I worked and the pastor owned one of these. The place only lasted maybe a year there and this might explain why... Karma, I guess.
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      06-20-2023, 07:19 AM   #8
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Too funny...a great read. Thanks for posting.
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      06-20-2023, 01:10 PM   #9
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"3 drunk gerbils playing would you rather"
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      06-20-2023, 09:11 PM   #10
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Are you insecure? Do you want to convey success to your peers without breaking the bank? I know what you’re thinking: BMW i8. But what if I told you that you don’t have to take out a 144 month 10% interest loan to buy that salvage i8? For just $24,000, you could be rolling down the boulevard in a Fisker Karma.

Arguably one of the best looking cars ever made, the Karma is a heaping pile of garbage engineered by three drunk gerbils playing a game of would you rather. Spoiler: All three would have rather done something else than work on the Karma.

The Karma is the answer to the question “what if someone designed a car where the only consideration is that it looks like a hot wheels?”. The Fisker is the only car the plebs care about. I don't care if you're rolling up to cars and coffee in a Rimac towing a P1. Nobody cares. They'll be too busy looking at the Fisker. The Urus in my garage? Invisible. Nobody cares. I show up to cars and coffee in a legitimately great example of a V10 Audi S8 and it’s like I rolled up in a Camry. Nobody cares. Even my girlfriend feels bad for me because nobody likes my "old man car". But the Karma? Holy hell. People snap pictures of you while you’re driving. They slam on their brakes as they pass you, just so they can see what they just passed. Cars and Coffee… You know where the crowd is? They’re gathered around the Testarossa, the XJ220 and the Fisker Karma. WHY? Who cares why. This is about attention and the Karma will get you that.

Strangers approach you asking what it is, how much it costs, where you got it and what you do for a living. Children at the school pickup line will gawk. Your kid will get in the car, feigning embarrassment but actually feeling proud that all their friends think they live in a mansion and fly on a private jet. You won't be able to afford a private jet though because you're maintaining a Fisker. That's your new life.

This car is hot trash. And I don’t mean this particular car. I mean the Karma. It looks nice and drives well. That’s it. The infotainment system frequently locks up. It’s slow. It offers all the worst attributes of a low range EV combined with an inefficient internal combustion engine. Sometimes you need to open the hood and reset it by literally unplugging it and plugging it back in. Why? Because f*%k you, that’s why. Henrik Fisker knows how to make a car look pretty. He just doesn’t know how to MAKE a car.

You’ll marvel at how this and the Model S came out at the same time and you’ll have plenty of time to marvel as the Karma’s 0-60 time is just “yes”.

This particular example was bought by me, sight unseen, in South Carolina. It’s 12v battery went dead and I assumed it needed a reflash from sitting. The gentleman that sold it to me knew how to spot a sucker and wouldn’t you know it, suddenly had a SECOND one to sell me, also not running. Me, having the IQ of a ferret during an ayahuasca trip, eagerly agreed to also buy the second car. Guess what? They were both hot trash.

I sold one to a smarter man than myself. He’s going to LS swap it. If I’m the cuck, he’s the bull, tagging my wife and locking eye contact with me as she emits sounds for him I’ve never heard before.

You might think I’d have learned my lesson but oh no no. I proceeded to throw good money after bad and spend an additional $16,000 sorting this car out. I know what you’re thinking: I’m a moron. If I was capable of critical thought I’d probably agree.

What’s $17,000 buy you in the world of Fisker repair? Here we go:

- 2 battery modules
- Main contactor
- 2 Small Contactors
- Load Sensor
- Blower motor
- Oil change
- Cam actuator
- Infotainment computer
- Control arm bushings
- Tie rods
- Headlight bulbs
- Seat panels
- Door clips
- Door latch switches
- Accelerator pedal
- PRND switch
- Cowl modification and sealing for proper drainage. (these retain water and toast all of the electronics unless they are modified)
- Coolant pump

Sometimes you’ll find an owner of an old V10 M5 with 200,000 miles and he’ll be like “Rod bearings? Never had a problem and I changed the oil every 10,000 miles”. That isn’t the case with the Karma. They ALL break and they all break the same way. There is no avoiding it. So you can either buy one of those low mileage bring a trailer examples and put $10,000 - $15,000 into them or you can just buy mine and know that you’re riding high on my poor financial decisions.

How’s it drive? Actually kind of great. It’s really heavy and has well weighted steering and a low center of gravity. It drives with presence but not competence. If you’re driving around town or taking road trips, this car is king. If you’re running through the canyons in Malibu, you’re going to have a bad time.

Full disclosure: this is a weekend car. This is not a daily driver. These cars, even when fully sorted, have “quirks”. If you’re getting into it and expecting a well polished experience you’re in for disappointment. This is like version one of the Model S only in a reality where Tesla went out of business before dropping the first over the air software update.

Let's cover the bad stuff way down here!

- Traction control light. The traction control system is GM based and readable the with a standard code scanner capable of reading GM codes. Likely a steering angle sensor or wheel speed sensor.

- In EV mode after about 15 - 25 miles of driving the car starts to lose power. Why? I don't know. It's as if you're not pressing the gas. This typically only happens when driving at sustained speeds above 40 mph. It does not happen in stop and go traffic. Placing the car in sport mode immediately resolves the issue and many people (me) drive the car in sport mode all the time anyhow, as that's the only mode that gives you full power. EV mode is slower. The battery will give you the entire 50 mile range regardless. I have no interest in putting more money into the car to find the issue.

- Tires have tread but are older. I've put 1200 or so miles on the car with them but I'd have them replaced.

I LOVE TRADES. But they have to be specific trades of equal value. My current garage has a Model 3, GL450, BMW i8, Audi S8 (V10) and a Maserati Ghibli S. Current cars on my short list are M5s (E60 or F10 and I don't mind SMG), TT Audi S8's, first generation Bentley Flying Spurs,Any 6 series gran coupe, or really any modern classics from the Germans. I love a good performance sedan that's not made in the US. I also don't mind tossing in more money for the right deal. Let me know what you have. The only must is that it's not a Fisker Karma!
Had to save it. It had me thinking I wanted one lol
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      06-21-2023, 08:31 AM   #11
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i remember when these cars were all the rage and I couldn't figure out anything special about them
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      06-21-2023, 09:37 AM   #12
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It's a really pretty Chevy Volt with issues.
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      06-21-2023, 09:47 AM   #13
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Mike Kopstain is the managing partner of Comedy Genius inc so probably a comedy writer. Nicely done.
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