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      05-22-2014, 02:14 PM   #89
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Thats exactly what i'm thinking.

I get confused so many times with the way people are. I feel like people get married for the wrong reasons.

If this is a Woman that you love and plan on spending the rest of your life with her, why should it matter?

If your ego is hurt, then i say man up! My self esteem is very high and i'm confident in myself. I dont measure my self with only money.
Your wife is one lucky gall, and I salute you.
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      05-22-2014, 02:31 PM   #90
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Your wife is one lucky gall, and I salute you.
Thank you, I'm not married yet however.
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      05-22-2014, 02:37 PM   #91
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Your wife is one lucky gall, and I salute you.
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Originally Posted by Whostheboss View Post
Thank you, I'm not married yet however.
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      05-22-2014, 02:39 PM   #92
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Originally Posted by Whostheboss View Post
Thank you, I'm not married yet however.
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Originally Posted by upstatedoc View Post

Haha, I'm too tired today, I can't even read. Sorry.

Doc, lol

TXSTYLE was supposed to get that comment, but oh well not my first fuckup.
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      05-22-2014, 02:59 PM   #93
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Lower middle class?? Where do you live?

I feel bad for all the families making 70K a year. I guess they must be living on welfare and eating mayonnaise sandwiches.
That's what the Mets ate when they squandered all their money away to Madoff
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      05-22-2014, 03:04 PM   #94
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I know of only one case where a spouse making considerably more eventually led to a divorce (she was making $300K a year at barely 30 years old, he ended up quitting his job and taking care of the household). Sad story.
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      05-22-2014, 03:07 PM   #95
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I know of only one case where a spouse making considerably more eventually led to a divorce (she was making $300K a year at barely 30 years old, he ended up quitting his job and taking care of the household). Sad story.
If you are divorced, I hear that Lups is single...
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      05-22-2014, 03:08 PM   #96
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Originally Posted by Whostheboss View Post
Thank you, I'm not married yet however.
explains the positive attitude towards women..
i know.. no one has been banned for mysogny on a car forum, right?
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      05-22-2014, 03:12 PM   #97
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If you are divorced, I hear that Lups is single...
Ha! I wasn't referring to myself in this story...
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      05-22-2014, 03:26 PM   #98
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Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Haha, I'm too tired today, I can't even read. Sorry.

Doc, lol

TXSTYLE was supposed to get that comment.
Thanks!
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      05-22-2014, 03:40 PM   #99
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explains the positive attitude towards women..
i know.. no one has been banned for mysogny on a car forum, right?
I've seen both sexes acting like idiots because of money, and best way to ensure a life time of unhappiness is going for the once who want your money. One of my best friends is finally seeing the light and getting a divorce, and I could not be happier for him.
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      05-22-2014, 03:49 PM   #100
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If you are divorced, I hear that Lups is single...
LOL! But baby, I'm only hitting on you, it's the red suit that sets me off to pursue you!
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      05-22-2014, 04:08 PM   #101
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Originally Posted by Lups View Post
I've seen both sexes acting like idiots because of money, and best way to ensure a life time of unhappiness is going for the once who want your money. One of my best friends is finally seeing the light and getting a divorce, and I could not be happier for him.
This thread is becoming like the "why do people get married" thread. lol

Here is my take on life & relationship. (please anyone feel free to correct me)

If your life isn't going so well, you are more vulnerable to be in a relationship. Meaning, if you're single and things aren't going well, your grades are poor, you lost a parent, both or one of your parent is a drug/alcohol addict, you're in debt caused by your irresponsibility, stressful or low paying job, poor health or health issues... these factors makes one want be in a relationship. It puts you at a sad state in life and makes people seek for happiness externally.

However, if you're single and your life is going well (not necessarily the ultimate life) but if your life is enjoyable, good paying job, good health, good family, no major life concerns for now or the future then you are more likely not to be in a relationship.

Being in a relationship brings you and your S.O's standard of life to an equilibrium. Meaning, if a Man's life style is awesome 10/10, and a Woman's lifestyle is shitty 2/10. If This man decides to date this Woman, after a few years of dating/marriage, both of their lifestyle will be 5/5, they have now equalized. The man lost a lot of the things he enjoyed and the Woman gained so much. (also vice versa)

I'm not a relationship expert but this is the part that makes me be very picky about choosing a girl. I have to be completely in love with her before i'm willing to sacrifice my life style if have to.

... and of course my above philosophy isn't 100% true, but it is for most cases.
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      05-22-2014, 04:15 PM   #102
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Originally Posted by Whostheboss View Post
This thread is becoming like the "why do people get married" thread. lol

Here is my take on life & relationship. (please anyone feel free to correct me)

If your life isn't going so well, you are more vulnerable to be in a relationship. Meaning, if you're single and things aren't going well, your grades are poor, you lost a parent, both or one of your parent is a drug/alcohol addict, you're in debt caused by your irresponsibility, stressful or low paying job, poor health or health issues... these factors makes one want be in a relationship. It puts you at a sad state in life and makes people seek for happiness externally.

However, if you're single and your life is going well (not necessarily the ultimate life) but if your life is enjoyable, good paying job, good health, good family, no major life concerns for now or the future then you are more likely not to be in a relationship.

Being in a relationship brings you and your S.O's standard of life to an equilibrium. Meaning, if a Man's life style is awesome 10/10, and a Woman's lifestyle is shitty 2/10. If This man decides to date this Woman, after a few years of dating/marriage, both of their lifestyle will be 5/5, they have now equalized. The man lost a lot of the things he enjoyed and the Woman gained so much. (also vice versa)

I'm not a relationship expert but this is the part that makes me be very picky about choosing a girl. I have to be completely in love with her before i'm willing to sacrifice my life style if have to.

... and of course my above philosophy isn't 100% true, but it is for most cases.
All that is sadly true. I would like to ad the age old thing, be happy with yourself, even in a relationship, since that carries us trough life, the spouse well chosen will only add happiness, if a person is capable of feeling it by themselves already.

And to the perv number one reading this, no I was not talking about masturbation, but feel free to enjoy that too.
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      05-22-2014, 04:17 PM   #103
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All that is sadly true. I would like to ad the age old thing, be happy with yourself, even in a relationship, since that carries us trough life, the spouse well chosen will only add happiness, if a person is capable of feeling it by themselves already.

And to the perv number one reading this, no I was not talking about masturbation, but feel free to enjoy that too.
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      05-22-2014, 04:23 PM   #104
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Whostheboss View Post
This thread is becoming like the "why do people get married" thread. lol

Here is my take on life & relationship. (please anyone feel free to correct me)

If your life isn't going so well, you are more vulnerable to be in a relationship. Meaning, if you're single and things aren't going well, your grades are poor, you lost a parent, both or one of your parent is a drug/alcohol addict, you're in debt caused by your irresponsibility, stressful or low paying job, poor health or health issues... these factors makes one want be in a relationship. It puts you at a sad state in life and makes people seek for happiness externally.

However, if you're single and your life is going well (not necessarily the ultimate life) but if your life is enjoyable, good paying job, good health, good family, no major life concerns for now or the future then you are more likely not to be in a relationship.

Being in a relationship brings you and your S.O's standard of life to an equilibrium. Meaning, if a Man's life style is awesome 10/10, and a Woman's lifestyle is shitty 2/10. If This man decides to date this Woman, after a few years of dating/marriage, both of their lifestyle will be 5/5, they have now equalized. The man lost a lot of the things he enjoyed and the Woman gained so much. (also vice versa)

I'm not a relationship expert but this is the part that makes me be very picky about choosing a girl. I have to be completely in love with her before i'm willing to sacrifice my life style if have to.

... and of course my above philosophy isn't 100% true, but it is for most cases.
tl;dr: I agree with some parts but not everything lol

I agree with the second part of your comment, that couples tend to equalize and find a middle-ground that suits them and their lives.

But I do not agree with the first parts of your statement. To me - and maybe I am misreading your post - it sounds like a relationship is a negative concept to you: " If your life isn't going so well, you are more vulnerable to be in a relationship" and " no major life concerns for now or the future then you are more likely not to be in a relationship."

My take on relationships are quite the opposite, in fact. I think that an inherent part of our nature is to be in a relationship and seek companionship/belonging/whatever-you-want-to-call-it. We, as animals, are able to evaluate potential mates as either a good candidate or a bad candidate. If your on drugs, homeless or otherwise on a bad path that makes you a poor candidate and less likely to be desired as a mate. On the otherhand the hardworking, happy, healthy, fit person would be seen as a good candidate and someone who could take care of the babies (and carry on the family).

If you are depressed, on drugs, unhealthy or stuck in a dead-end low paying job you are most certainly not looking to find a partner. I DO however agree with your statement that this is when people would seek external happiness. But that will be in the form of booze, drugs or some other form of self-medication to take away from the stresses of their reality. The healthy, happy person with their $#i+ together understands the value of families, children, etc and will be in a place financially, mentally and emotionally to seek that out.
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      05-22-2014, 04:28 PM   #105
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tl;dr: I agree with some parts but not everything lol

I agree with the second part of your comment, that couples tend to equalize and find a middle-ground that suits them and their lives.

But I do not agree with the first parts of your statement. To me - and maybe I am misreading your post - it sounds like a relationship is a negative concept to you: " If your life isn't going so well, you are more vulnerable to be in a relationship" and " no major life concerns for now or the future then you are more likely not to be in a relationship."

My take on relationships are quite the opposite, in fact. I think that an inherent part of our nature is to be in a relationship and seek companionship/belonging/whatever-you-want-to-call-it. We, as animals, are able to evaluate potential mates as either a good candidate or a bad candidate. If your on drugs, homeless or otherwise on a bad path that makes you a poor candidate and less likely to be desired as a mate. On the otherhand the hardworking, happy, healthy, fit person would be seen as a good candidate and someone who could take care of the babies (and carry on the family).

If you are depressed, on drugs, unhealthy or stuck in a dead-end low paying job you are most certainly not looking to find a partner. I DO however agree with your statement that this is when people would seek external happiness. But that will be in the form of booze, drugs or some other form of self-medication to take away from the stresses of their reality. The healthy, happy person with their $#i+ together understands the value of families, children, etc and will be in a place financially, mentally and emotionally to seek that out.
+1

My single life was awesome. Money, cars, a house, all before I got married. I'm now married and have someone I care about so much to share all that with. That's all that really changed. Life is still awesome.
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      05-22-2014, 04:28 PM   #106
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tl;dr: I agree with some parts but not everything lol

I agree with the second part of your comment, that couples tend to equalize and find a middle-ground that suits them and their lives.

But I do not agree with the first parts of your statement. To me - and maybe I am misreading your post - it sounds like a relationship is a negative concept to you: " If your life isn't going so well, you are more vulnerable to be in a relationship" and " no major life concerns for now or the future then you are more likely not to be in a relationship."

My take on relationships are quite the opposite, in fact. I think that an inherent part of our nature is to be in a relationship and seek companionship/belonging/whatever-you-want-to-call-it. We, as animals, are able to evaluate potential mates as either a good candidate or a bad candidate. If your on drugs, homeless or otherwise on a bad path that makes you a poor candidate and less likely to be desired as a mate. On the otherhand the hardworking, happy, healthy, fit person would be seen as a good candidate and someone who could take care of the babies (and carry on the family).

If you are depressed, on drugs, unhealthy or stuck in a dead-end low paying job you are most certainly not looking to find a partner. I DO however agree with your statement that this is when people would seek external happiness. But that will be in the form of booze, drugs or some other form of self-medication to take away from the stresses of their reality. The healthy, happy person with their $#i+ together understands the value of families, children, etc and will be in a place financially, mentally and emotionally to seek that out.
I agree with you even more. You are one stylish beast mr Red.

Love is so frigging difficult at times, but the rewards are huge.
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      05-22-2014, 04:29 PM   #107
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my take: just be yourself.

my wife didn't marry some soft ass dude that didn't know how to run a household...

she likes my brash attitude and overall unfiltered outlook on life...

the way I see it, she can stay if she wants or she can leave as she pleases - same with all of my friends...

I wouldn't have many if they were all offended by my attitude and sometimes aggressive personality...

I'm me - I don't change that for anyone...

wife married me knowing that and she has no ragrets about it either.....
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      05-22-2014, 04:35 PM   #108
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 954Stealth View Post
tl;dr: I agree with some parts but not everything lol

I agree with the second part of your comment, that couples tend to equalize and find a middle-ground that suits them and their lives.

But I do not agree with the first parts of your statement. To me - and maybe I am misreading your post - it sounds like a relationship is a negative concept to you: " If your life isn't going so well, you are more vulnerable to be in a relationship" and " no major life concerns for now or the future then you are more likely not to be in a relationship."

My take on relationships are quite the opposite, in fact. I think that an inherent part of our nature is to be in a relationship and seek companionship/belonging/whatever-you-want-to-call-it. We, as animals, are able to evaluate potential mates as either a good candidate or a bad candidate. If your on drugs, homeless or otherwise on a bad path that makes you a poor candidate and less likely to be desired as a mate. On the otherhand the hardworking, happy, healthy, fit person would be seen as a good candidate and someone who could take care of the babies (and carry on the family).

If you are depressed, on drugs, unhealthy or stuck in a dead-end low paying job you are most certainly not looking to find a partner. I DO however agree with your statement that this is when people would seek external happiness. But that will be in the form of booze, drugs or some other form of self-medication to take away from the stresses of their reality. The healthy, happy person with their $#i+ together understands the value of families, children, etc and will be in a place financially, mentally and emotionally to seek that out.
wow, you're very true.

From your point of view, a person in a bad state of life will be seen as a bad candidate, whereas a person in a good state of life will be seen as a good candidate.
But my point of view comes from that person, not how they are seen.
Think of it this way, the person in a bad state of life, is more likely to go to an online dating site to search for a partner. They are very desperate to find a date, finding a partner is their #1 priority.
But the person in a good state of life, will never go to an online dating site, they couldnt care any less. finding a partner is #5 or #6 in their priorities.
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      05-22-2014, 04:37 PM   #109
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...
wife married me knowing that and she has no ragrets about it either.....
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      05-22-2014, 04:38 PM   #110
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Whostheboss View Post
Think of it this way, the person in a bad state of life, is more likely to go to an online dating site to search for a partner. They are very desperate to find a date, finding a partner is their #1 priority.
But the person in a good state of life, will never go to an online dating site, they couldnt care any less. finding a partner is #5 or #6 in their priorities.
I disagree...

people who are in a bad state of life usually go out to bars/clubs looking for a mate...

I work with too many single idiot chicks that think the best place to meet a "good guy" is a club...

they have no idea that guys go to clubs to get pussy, and that's pretty much it.....
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