BMW i5 and 5-Series Forum

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      06-01-2016, 08:53 AM   #331
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Originally Posted by smoosh View Post
The last few months, I've gone on dates with amazing/beautiful women with absolutely no intention of getting into a relationship. I take them out, learn about them, have fun, then, right when I feel we're getting to the point where we'd decide whether we want to get into a relationship, handwrite them a poem about them, send it to em, and cut it off.

Never speak to them again.

It's kinda fun, tbh lol.
that's because they don't challenge you - I do the same with my computer games, examine, evaluate and plan the new randomly generated world, then don't really want to play it cuz its tedious - the fun is in the "newness" -once you've "solved" it, it no longer interests u so u get another completely new girl and do the same thing over! never getting very deep because that's not what you're interested in
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      06-01-2016, 09:18 AM   #332
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You could be a toll booth attendant! Plus, think of all the Audi's you would be able to spit on!
We don't have those here that would be epic though.
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      06-01-2016, 11:38 AM   #333
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      06-01-2016, 12:15 PM   #334
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I once dreamt that I had my armpit hair highlighted and braided.
Dudeee. Whee do you guys come up with this stuff lol
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      06-01-2016, 12:16 PM   #335
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I once dreamt of a cabbage being dropped into a bowl of milk. I awoke in a cold sweat once the milk splashed in my face. I then proceeded to iron my socks at 3am.
True true. Makes sense i guess
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      06-01-2016, 12:59 PM   #336
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Originally Posted by duck fat View Post
On the topic of farting. One time at Costco, some butt nugget stole my parking spot so I spent half an hour hunting him down and crop dusting him through an entire aisle.
This is the proper course of action, you did the right thing, except next time you need to up your game. Eat some prunes and leave a nice soft dump on the front windshield.

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Originally Posted by Lups View Post
We don't have those here that would be epic though.
So come back to the US, it's the perfect opportunity, and I can finally get my pool cleaning job back! It's a win win situation for us both!

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Originally Posted by natedog7700 View Post
Dudeee. Whee do you guys come up with this stuff lol
Just natural articulation from the depths of our hearts. The fact that it's so free flowing yearns appreciation, although some on here do worry me, self included.
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      06-02-2016, 04:46 PM   #337
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I'm worried about less time with my car because baby is here soon. Its a real problem and I can't cope.

Halo seats for baby or for me?
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      06-02-2016, 05:09 PM   #338
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Originally Posted by M3 Number 86 View Post
I'm worried about less time with my car because baby is here soon. Its a real problem and I can't cope.

Halo seats for baby or for me?
Congrats! Know the sex yet? If it's a boy raise him around cars just like I did to have some sort of bondage. Also, as long as wifey doesn't make you trade it in for a minivan then you are safe.
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Also our E90 330 and 325 will soon have some sort of boost. So there is actually more of a chance to get more hp out of a 330 then a 335 in my opinion
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      06-02-2016, 06:48 PM   #339
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Quote:
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Quote:
Originally Posted by M3 Number 86 View Post
I'm worried about less time with my car because baby is here soon. Its a real problem and I can't cope.

Halo seats for baby or for me?
Congrats! Know the sex yet? If it's a boy raise him around cars just like I did to have some sort of bondage. Also, as long as wifey doesn't make you trade it in for a minivan then you are safe.
Uh, you could raise your girl around cars too
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      06-02-2016, 07:39 PM   #340
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Uh, you could raise your girl around cars too
Seriously...

I was raised around Hello Kitty so girls can learn to turn a wrench.
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      06-02-2016, 07:41 PM   #341
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bimmette View Post
Uh, you could raise your girl around cars too
Seriously...

I was raised around Hello Kitty so girls can learn to turn a wrench.
Aaaah, that explains a lot.
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      06-02-2016, 07:45 PM   #342
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      06-02-2016, 08:50 PM   #343
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Quote:
Originally Posted by F30lolz
Congrats! Know the sex yet? If it's a boy raise him around cars just like I did to have some sort of bondage. Also, as long as wifey doesn't make you trade it in for a minivan then you are safe.
Also, bondage with your kids not recommended. If you want bondage with kids, become a school teacher at a middle school.
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      06-02-2016, 09:23 PM   #344
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Aaaah, that explains a lot.
Representing all the time too

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      06-03-2016, 01:50 AM   #345
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Quote:
Originally Posted by F30lolz
Quote:
Originally Posted by M3 Number 86 View Post
I'm worried about less time with my car because baby is here soon. Its a real problem and I can't cope.

Halo seats for baby or for me?
Congrats! Know the sex yet? If it's a boy raise him around cars just like I did to have some sort of bondage. Also, as long as wifey doesn't make you trade it in for a minivan then you are safe.
Trying to name him ayrton lol. Wife already agreed to Senna of it was a girl but having a hard time with this one. May have to concede for second kid lol.

October. So he's stealing my birthday weekend already. Well go to the track together lol
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      06-03-2016, 01:51 AM   #346
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bimmette
Quote:
Originally Posted by F30lolz
Quote:
Originally Posted by M3 Number 86 View Post
I'm worried about less time with my car because baby is here soon. Its a real problem and I can't cope.

Halo seats for baby or for me?
Congrats! Know the sex yet? If it's a boy raise him around cars just like I did to have some sort of bondage. Also, as long as wifey doesn't make you trade it in for a minivan then you are safe.
Uh, you could raise your girl around cars too
In reality that's slim to none. See how many dudes are on here? Lol
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      06-03-2016, 03:03 AM   #347
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I confess, I own an Audi and BMW.
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      06-03-2016, 12:18 PM   #348
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Originally Posted by natedog7700 View Post
I hope your kidding. Man I don't know what to believe in this thread anymore, its got so out of hand lol
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      06-05-2016, 02:24 PM   #349
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      06-06-2016, 03:20 AM   #350
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I confess, it was more than the tip.
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      06-06-2016, 05:46 AM   #351
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jtodd_fl View Post
I always wanted to date a biker chick.
they do like to ride know what I mean.... but don't take home to mama.....
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      06-06-2016, 09:09 AM   #352
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Quote:
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jtodd_fl View Post
I always wanted to date a biker chick.
they do like to ride know what I mean.... but don't take home to mama.....
And race biker chicks like to be leaned forward when they ride.

Edit: also, knee scrapes are seen as a badge of honor! Win!
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